As I look out my window and see patches of dead, brown grass among the snowdrifts created by past storms, I am rattled to the core...maybe overwhelmed...
2014 a year of new beginnings (This is take 2 on this blog.) and fresh starts for many of us. We set resolutions, make plans and goals. Some we succeed at, others fade away over time like the morning fog as the sun appears. I have two goals this year, both pretty straight forward: lose weight and become closer to God. And they go hand in hand!
If you know me, this may surprise you. Not so much the weight loss, but my desire to become closer to God. I want to be honest with you, just because I went to a Lutheran university to become trained to teach in Lutheran schools doesn't mean I don't struggle with my faith! We all have peaks and valleys, plateaus and mountain top experiences when it comes to our faith and relationship with God. I believe this is just part of our human nature.
Why am I rattled to the core you ask? While looking out my window this morning, it was as if God literally was standing beside me and whispered in my ear, "Deje, I love how you are working on your desire to grow closer to me and how you are FINALLY linking together your weight loss journey with your faith journey. See what happens when we work together? I have plans for you that are just a spark in your mind right now." The next thing that popped into my head was...what if? Now this, if spoken aloud in front of my hubby would make him look at me, with the 'uh-oh, she has an idea' look.
I paused, grabbed my hot tea and sat back down at the kitchen table. WHAT IF? What if what through the things I am doing now to become closer to God and lose weight like being apart of the 40,000+ women who are taking part in Proverbs 31's "Made to Crave" study and leading it at church is part of God's plan for something bigger for me? What if He is preparing me through the Good Morning Girls "Intentionally Focused" study and going through Dave Ramsey's "Financial Peace University" to do something else?
WHAT IF...women's ministry...encouraging other women in their faith walk...what if this is the next chapter God has planned for me....maybe not right at this exact moment, but slowly through small steps, a little at a time? What if ...? How, when, what, where, and why are questions that I will have to pray over and turn over to God to answer in His time. I truly believe that if this is His will for me it will become clear over time. My hope and prayer would be for this next chapter to become a blessing to me, my family, to others.
But, for now, I am content with doing all the things I am doing now while listening for God in my quiet time with Him.